Let Me Tell You How I Told my Boss to Not Stick His Dick in Crazy

I have thoughts about traditional 9–5 work, and none of them are good.

Harmony S
10 min readJun 1, 2022


Photo by krakenimages on Unsplash

Back in November of 2019, I faced a crisis.

I had just flown from Tel Aviv to Krakow, Poland. The final destination was going to be Bergen, Norway, where I’d spend the winter. It’s a long story how I started living in Bergen, but it has to do with that weirdo sugar daddy I wrote about in the article below:

This period of time had coincided with the inception of COVID-19. Panic had yet to fully set in, and there was still a modicum of freedom to travel globally. However, by the day, the news began to grow more worrisome.

Norway has a three-month visa policy, and the Schengen agreement that Norway is part of stipulates that you must spend three months outside the region before returning. I’d been going between Norway and Jordan for about a year and a half at that point, spending three months in one country before flying to the second. However, since reality started to seriously slip away by January, I didn’t know for how long I’d be able to keep that up.

What sucked a lot was I’d won a semester long scholarship to further my studies in Classical Arabic in Morocco, but I decided against going because everyone was predicting the worst was yet to come. In hindsight, getting trapped in Morocco sounded like a complete fucking nightmare.

Bare in mind I had no one to lean on in America at that time, so my options were frighteningly slim. Plus by that year I had started to really accept the idea this sugar daddy situation was completely fucking creepy and I needed to run, asap.

I decided to find an office job immediately in America in my field, which is GIS. If you’re not familiar with GIS, please check out my article about the topic here:



Harmony S

H A P P Y and you should be TOO!!! LIFE IS AMAZING 👏🦝🦄🌺🍭I write for ILLUMINATION, The Memoirist, Fuck Niches, and The Orange Journal.